Her Unfeeling Heart.

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Tingling in her palms was the first sign.
Slight, nervous giggle that escaped her lips, the second.
She missed all the signs. At first.
Her heart started beating at the speed of the bullet train.
That’s when she realised that she was feeling again.
There was anticipation. And, nervousness.
There was expectation. And, excitement.
There was activity in the left part of her chest.
It had been stoic for far too long.
She was amazed. She hadn’t felt anything in such a long time.
She was feeling again.
She wanted to feel everything.
She was feeling everything.
There was nothing amiss but one thing.
Her unfeeling heart.

-a-

She wanted.

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Wanted.

She sat still on the windowsill
Looking down at the street below.
The mother of 4 juggling the groceries,
The mad man singing about getting killed on Friday,
The vagabond trying to sell rattraps to whoever would look him in the eye,
The giggling girls talking about boys they’ve loved before.
She sat there, staring, and speculating.
She was there. And, yet not.
She was thinking about the time gone by.
She was thinking about the days wasted.
She was thinking about the past that flew by her, unnoticed.
She wanted to live again, and not just exist.
She wanted to take it all in, and not just breathe.
She wanted her life back.
She wanted to live.
She wanted.

-a-

5 Ways to Get on with Life Once a TV Series Ends.

When you invest hours upon hours in a story, the characters, the relationships, and the emotions, you form an attachment to that TV series. Watching it and waiting to watch it becomes a habit you can’t seem to shake off. You think about what happened in the last episode you watched when you wake up and you wonder about what will happen next when you go to bed. You start breathing, living, and dreaming in the world of those beloved characters. You obsess and you want to get to the end. But when you do, it hits you like a sledgehammer.

Mayen. What? It’s over? No more Kate and Sawyer? No more annoying Jack? What do I do now? WHAT!?!*

It’s not easy to move on from the life you had experienced alongside your own. It was as if it’s yours, too. You were with them right there on the island, too. So, how to get out of the funk and get on with your life when it’s ended?

Here are 5 steps how.

1. START WATCHING A NEW SERIES. Duh

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Well, isn’t that the most obvious option? To stop obsessing over one thing, and to start obsessing over something else. As simple as that. Not exactly healthy. But, well, a person in need got to do what they got to do.

2. WRITE AND SCRAPBOOK.

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Get it out, darling. Whatever it is that comes to your head when you think of it, write it down in a separate notebook. Scrapbook. Paste pictures, and little trinkets that remind you of that favorite scene, write stuff about characters and write about your opinions on a particular twist that the new season brought about. And once you have it all poured over the pages, make a time capsule and put the notebook away for next, say, 2 years. You will reminisce and be so damn happy when you get to see it again.

3. START A FAN BLOG.

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It’s the new cool. People love to find people with similar interests. Write reviews of episodes, your opinions about different relationships throughout the series, how it could have turned out better, how it couldn’t have been any better, characters and their lives, the actors and their lives…blog it out of your system.

4. START YOUR OWN RANGE OF MEMORABILIA MERCHANDISE.

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If you have the funds and the time, you can start your own range of merchandise dedicated to the series. This will engage your creative sides and will make the ideas swirling inside your head a beautiful reality. This will get you to stop going crazy and will be like a productive transformation of the series in your life. Not to mention, you will make money out of it.

Who doesn’t want an amazing pendant, or ring, or key chain, or mugs, or tee-shirts which reminds them of their beloved series?

5. RE WATCH.

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Re watch the whole series again. Maybe then you will get over it and stop obsessing. When it becomes predictable and not so wonderful anymore, maybe it won’t be that great for you. Maybe you will realize that all it was meant for was 2 reruns and now it’s time to move on.

Getting over something isn’t easy. It takes time and patience. A TV series is nothing different. So, try to get over it, do stuff that might help, but if you aren’t able to move on, maybe you aren’t meant to. Not yet.

(NOTE: This isn’t only about moving on from a TV series. These steps can be followed to get over anything. If it’s a relationship –with friends, with family, whatever –maybe you got to start trying. Or, maybe not. It’s your call. Take your time. With a little improvising these steps can be used to get over anything in life. All you need is patience. And, a little faith.)

*referencing the TV series LOST.

मुकम्मल (Complete)

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Collecting all the pieces of my heart, softly, he completed me.
उनसे मुलाकात हुई।
पल दो पल की बात हुई।
लगे वो कुछ अपने से।
लगे कुछ जाने पहचाने से।
छू लिया उन्होंने दिल को।
हमारी रूह में झाँक लिया।
मिले वहाँ कुछ टुकड़े बिखरे हुए।
नरमी से समेटकर,
मुकम्मल कर दिया।।
-a-
Translation:
I met him.
we talked for a second or two.
He felt like he was mine.
He felt familiar.
He touched my heart.
He looked into my soul.
There lay some scattered pieces.
Collecting all the pieces of my heart, softly,
He completed me.

Longest 8 Seconds

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Because regrets are nothing more than ink spots on that pristine white paper that ruins it from being of any further use.*shrugs*

After you’ve been systematically abused, your judgment erodes to the point where it’s nearly impossible to make decisions. Small decisions are as tough as big ones. Even choosing a breakfast cereal seems filled with peril. You are so scared about doing the wrong thing, being blamed and punished for it, you’d rather have someone else take the responsibility. And, the moment you give away your ability to hold that responsibility, you give away your agency. And, an individual without agency is nothing more than a slave to the past. It’s necessary, hence, to hold on to your power to make decisions and take up for it. To take up for yourself. Because that’s what every individual is about: Free will. So, take hold of that bull of the past by the horns and ride the longest 8 seconds of your life. Because once you decide to let go of the past and decide to go with the bull’s movements, you have already won. You are a winner against your own self.
And, isn’t that the most important fight?

Toodles!
~A♥~

P.S. It’s been a looooong while since I wrote something. Words had seemed to have abandoned me these past months. I haven’t written anything in almost 4 months. I couldn’t. 2 meaningful lines were A LOT to ask for. I dunno why. I just couldn’t find motivation to write, I guess. But, well, life’s been crazy. Shit happened. And, after hundreds of everyday resolutions of trying to get myself to write these months, I just decided to sit, staring at the wall till I could write again. I wanted to write something extremely positive this new year’s. But, this is all I could come up with. So, make do with this till I can get my mo-positive-jo back.
It was good, trying this writing thing again. I feel good. Really good. And, I am gonna try again. I will try to write. For myself and for everyone else around me because I become a total jerk when I don’t.
A very happy new year’s to all of you out there who haven’t unfollowed me in my absence. And to everybody else, too (I am not that much of a jerk yet, I promise.).
I hope you have a wonderful 2017.💟

P.P.S. All of your comments that are in the ‘waiting for approval’, I will reply as soon as possible. Gimme some time, yeah?
Catch ya soon.💕